Art section

This is the tail of Daniel Morgan,
Who had a tiny sexual organ,
It was just one inch when fully reared,
When lying down it disappeared.
It was just by chance they called him Danny,
Half an inch less they'd have called him fanny,
It gave his girlfriends such a shock,
When they put their hands on his tiny cock,

One day Dan read in the daily mail that things called falsies were on sale,
For women who had tiny breasts they wore these things inside their vests,
Now Dan said ?I'm no fool, why can't I make a big false tool?
So he worked all night to make a shopper,
And he ended up with a great big whopper,
It was twelve inches long and made of plastic,
And would stretch any girls fanny, like elastic,
It really was a lovely job and on the end was a big red knob,
He tied it up with lots of twine and it really did look rather fine,
Lying there beneath his pants,
It looked just like an elephants.

No other guy stood a chance when Dan attended the local dance,
For when the girls danced with our Danny,
His tool kept tickling round their fanny.
The girls began to faint and swoon as Danny waltzed them round the room,
But what a shock they had in stall,
For one night dancing round the hall,
Danny stopped and loudly cursed,
He'd felt the string and strapping burst.
Before he'd reached the nearest seat, his tool was dangling at his feet,

A girl named Silvia made Dan sick for she gave his tool a spiteful kick,
Poor Danny's screams ran round the hall,
For the string was tied round one of his balls.
Of course by now the band was crackers,
While in the gents Dan bathed his knackers.

So if you're like poor Daniel Morgan,
And have a tiny sexual organ,
Remember though it's only wee,
It's always good enough, just to Pee