Spill your coffee, or tea what have you

That is a remarkable piece of flying, incredible.

the pilots circled for a good 3 hours to burn the fuel they had in the tanks, fuel dumping is not allowed for obvious environmental and security reasons.

Uh and I dunno who said that "if they do it it's a standard procedure for it" I can tell you NO, there's not such "standard procedure". You're giving the means and the scenarios, but you cannot fathom any possible solution.
A close friend of mine flies with F-18s in Canada and he said that he would probably deploy the arrestor hook once he hits the ground, not BEFORE ("we know of the F111 guys, that was a non standard procedure that could have gone very, very wrong.."), cos you're gonna slam the plane on the tarmac.

[digix]

What about bellylanding on the grass? Not an option?

nope, that thing comes down quite fast (120mph - 200km/h)and you want a hard surface that won't deform on impact and that can keep the plane relatively steady.