Be patient...
Ace Combat 6's MP had many of the same problems this game has and a patch eventually came out that remedied those problems, BUT it took 6 months. Take a look at what the patch took care of:
patch notes. Because of the similarity ill give IL-2 the same time frame before I give up on it.
I don't believe the guy running around the forums posing as a 505 employee. If you want to believe him and abandon the game, go ahead. I'll buy your copy for cheap and give it to one of the guys on my squad that wants to play but can't afford it.
In the meantime there are plenty of us still playing. Sure it may be hard to find matches 24hrs a day, but this ain't Halo. If you cant find a match at noon on Sunday it doesnt mean the game is dead, it means that people go to church, eat lunch, or have something better to do on a Sunday afternoon. When you get on and can't find a match, HOST ONE. I can say with great confidence that you aren't the only player on the planet looking for a match.
If you love the game but feel you can't play a fair game until the patch comes out, find players that fly with a crash ethic and fly with them. I know plenty of players that will hold their plane up long enough for you to get your kill. If you are in a squad but holding off on challenges because of crashing, lets play a match and declare the winner by number of deaths instead of kills. Also, some of the most fun I've had in this game is getting together with squad mates and doing some free flight. We do ATC, formation flying, touch & go's or just fly around and talk.
Sorry for another patch post, but I feel like speculation and misinformation on these forums is hurting the game as much as the lack of a patch.