Pilot Humour

[Codex]

The German air controllers at Frankfurt Airport are a short-tempered lot. They not only expect one to know one's gate parking location, but how to get there without any assistance from them. So it was with some amusement that we (a Pan Am 747) listened to the following exchange between Frankfurt ground control and a British Airways 747, call sign "Speedbird 206":
Speedbird 206: "Top of the morning, Frankfurt, Speedbird 206 clear of the active runway."
Ground: "Guten Morgen. You vill taxi to your gate."
The big British Airways 747 pulled onto the main taxiway and slowed to a stop.
Ground: "Speedbird, do you not know where you are going?"
Speedbird 206: "Stand by a moment, Ground, I'm looking up our gate location now."
Ground (with arrogant impatience): "Speedbird 206, haff you never flown to Frankfurt before?"
Speedbird 206 (coolly): Yes, I have, actually, in 1944. In another type of Boeing, but just to drop something off. I didn't stop."


http://simpit.christrup.net/

[flyingbullseye]

LOL, I like it thanks for sharing.

Flyingbullseye

[genbrien]

the face of the controller must have been priceless

[flyingbullseye]

Originally Posted by genbrien

the face of the controller must have been priceless

As was probably the co-pilot's.

Flyingbullseye

[Codex]

While practicing autorotations during a military night training exercise a Huey Cobra screwed up the landing and landed on the tail rotor. The landing was so hard that it broke off the tail boom. However, the chopper fortunately remained upright on its skids, sliding down the runway doing 360s.
As the Cobra slid past the tower, trailing a brilliant shower of sparks, this was the radio exchange that took place...
Tower: "Sir, do you need any assistance?"
Cobra: "I don't know Tower, we ain't done crashin' yet."



As a C-5 Galaxy landed and cleared the active, it taxied by a Boeing 747 holding short of the runway. The C-5 aircraft commander, knowing how much larger his giant military behemoth was than the civilian aircraft, keyed the mic and asked the 747 captain, "Hey little buddy, what's your gross?" Not to be out done the 747 captain keyed his mic and replied "A little over two hundred thousand dollars a year, how about you?"

[zapatista]

german coastguard is not much better (from henfre's post in the other thread)

http://www.splashvision.com/video/15...ard-Funny.html

[Flyby]

Originally Posted by zapatista

german coastguard is not much better (from henfre's post in the other thread)

http://www.splashvision.com/video/15...ard-Funny.html

LOL!!! you guys are priceless!! well done! got more?
Flyby out

[Codex]

They're from the link above my sig in my initial post, go to the site and scroll to the bottom of the page.

There are some 1st class jokes there.

[Flyby]

rgrt. good stuff there.
Flyby out

[Lucas_From_Hell]

Well, one of the best pilot jokes is the movie "Bill et John"

Part 1:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1wEURyjB3Lc

Part 2:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FvOfZ...eature=related