Hi Flanker.
Your best friend is always going to be experience. There is no other magic wand or trick that is going to turn your luck around.
By coincidence I did a video of a Lagg dodging two Bf109s a while ago and put it up here:
I never felt uncomfortable watching an enemy fighter come in from my six to attack, there are a number of videos on my channel showing fighters attacking my six and ending up on the losing end. My least favorite is the head-on confrontation because they often end up in a collision or both planes getting fatal hits.
If you ever want to meet up online and practice that is fine with me, I will fly the Lagg and you can fly whatever else you want from any year and save the tracks of what we do in case something worthwhile comes out of it.
I always try to fly hard settings when I can, to me anything else is gaming and not simming.
S!