[RickRuski]

Ventriloquist visiting Wales walks into a small village and sees a local sitting on his porch patting his dog.
He figures he'll have a little fun, so he says to the Welshman.
'Hiya, mind if I talk to your dog?'

Villager: 'The dog doesn't talk, you stupid English *****.
Ventriloquist: 'Hello dog, how's it going mate?'

Dog: 'Yeah, doing all right.'

Welshman: (look of extreme shock)

Ventriloquist: 'Is this villager your owner?' (pointing at the villager)

Dog: 'Yep.'

Ventriloquist: 'How does he treat you?'

Dog: 'Yeah, real good. He walks me twice a day, feeds me great food and takes me to the lake once a week to play.'

Welshman: (look of utter disbelief)

Ventriloquist: 'Mind if I talk to your horse?'

Welshman: 'Uh, the horse doesn't talk either... I think.'

Ventriloquist: 'Hey horse, how's it going?'

Horse: 'Cool.'

Welshman: (absolutely dumbfounded)

Ventriloquist: 'Is this your owner?' (Pointing at the villager)

Horse: 'Yep.

Ventriloquist: 'How does he treat you?'

Horse: 'Pretty good, thanks for asking.
He rides me regularly, brushes me down often and keeps me in the shed to protect me from the elements.'

Welshman: (total look of amazement)

Ventriloquist: 'Mind if I talk to your sheep?'

Welshman: (in a panic) 'The sheep's a bloody liar......!!.....