Lol, points of view man, you should try mine first, the stock car needs some tweaking with suspensions and remapping, and diesel engines might not sound exciting (mine actually does, the overrun is fantastic!), but have SO much torque and are way more reliable than petrol engines.. 0-60 in 5.8 and top speed in excess of 140mph. As for your beloved Top Gear, they destroyed a 911 some years ago..
To me a car is not just about performance, the looks (or "head-turning factor" as my friend says) are more important, but if I wanted a performing car I'd rather buy me a Nissan GT-R or an Ariel Atom, which both kick the rear end of ANY Porsche for less than half the price.. uh, and honestly, Porsche's look is appalling, nothing more than a "beefed up Beetle"
Unlike Alfa Romeo, Porsche is a (pretentious) brand statement, which doesn't seem to excel neither in looks or performance (or better, performance/price balance). At least Alfas look cool
One thing is for sure though: if Porsche had the Alfa Romeo designers, or Alfa Romeo had the Porsche engineers, we wouldn't need to walk anymore..