Our dedi machine has several IP addresses so using netstat -a won't gives you much more information. But TCP 127.0.0.1:20003 (cod server) is part of the information shown (so I'd say that's not the problem). Quite honestly I don't know what your problems are. Our configs look identical albeit we've jumped up the netspeed considering we have a 1 gigabyte per second all fiber connection.
We our running server 2008 x64 and our firewall is on. If you can't even direct connect to your server, then I'd say your server is blocking a port. Showing up on steam is one thing, but not being able to connect to your server (via direct connect) makes it sound like your server is blocking network traffic that COD requires or that the mission didn't load correctly.
What are your hardware specs?
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